From the random files...

You know, every once in a while I have to write one of these kinds of posts. The kind that is sort of hodgepodge of half-formulated thoughts and ideas that don't really deserve their own post. So if you've ever wondered what a blonde thinks about, wonder no more. But first, here's an obnoxious selfie that has nothing to do with anything.

I recently went two months without carbs/sugar. It was hard. But then last week I went three days without caffeine and I thought I was going to die. I was sleeping for 10 hours every night and taking naps during the day too. After three days I gave up and had a Monster. The reward for cutting out carbs and sugar was to lose weight and I did. And the reward for giving up caffeine is what exactly? To feel like you've been hit by a truck? #addict

I get a bizarre sense of satisfaction when I see people I admire pin all the same stuff I do. It's like a sign from the universe that we should be besties. #girlcrushes

And while we are on the subject of girlfriends, I've decided that making new girlfriends is pretty much the same as dating. Awkward, painful, hmmn...on second thought, this theory might actually warrant an entire blog post. #sociallyinept

If you have an allergic reaction to some eye shadow you should probably throw it away...not stuff it back into your ginormous bag of lesser used make-up. Because six months later you will most certainly find that eye shadow and be like, hey I forgot about this stuff, I'm gonna put it on right now! And then four hours later when your eyelids start itching and swelling you will remember that this is exactly what happened the last time. #quasimodo

I'm starting to notice that different parts of my body are aging differently. For example, my back feels like it should belong to a 65 year old. But yet somehow I still have baby fat on my knees at the tender age of 30. Though, I think I would rather have old knees and a young back. #fattyknees

Fall always makes me want to change up my hair. I have a haircut in mind but I also really want to grow out my bangs. I love them but I need a change. Anyway, I thought that this would be a quick transition since my hair grows so fast I pretty much have to trim my bangs every week. But of course now that I'm trying to grow them out they've stopped growing, I swear. They are too long to wear down, but still too short to wear them to the side. Ugh. Hopefully my patience will last, my scissors are starting feel extra itchy. #firstworldproblems

My eyebrows are in dire need of help. I've let them run wild for the past 11 months. Scary. I want to go get them professionally done because I can never get them to match. But I'm terrified of the pain. I may have gone 23 hours in a Pitocin-induced labor with no painkillers but just the thought of someone else ripping tiny little hairs out of my eyebrows makes me cringe. My eyes are even starting to water just typing this. Maybe I could be put out for the procedure? Or at least get some laughing gas? #wuss

Despite the fact that I've had an immaculate driving record for 14 years whenever my husband is in my passenger seat he is convinced that he is going to die. Sometimes he even reaches over and grabs the steering wheel to swerve my car out of danger's path. Not cool. #passengerdriver #literally

Argument with the husband on Saturday = carmel blueberry waffles on Sunday from the husband. Consider the fight over. #lessonlearned

Did you know this? I'm so proud to be half Scottish. #cool

And lastly, if someone could just order me the entire Fall Boden collection, that'd be great. #itchycreditcard