Shye is 10 months old. Today is the last day I can say that. Tomorrow she is 11 months old and the count down to her first birthday begins.
I'm not ready for it.
I mean, I've got all the details planned for a totally rad first birthday party, but I'm not ready for my baby to be a one year-old....a toddler. Over the past few days I've been seeing some major toddlerness coming out in her. She throws fits when she can't have what she wants. She is becoming much more vocal and determined. She is learning to share. She is letting go and standing on her own. She is venturing a step here and there.
And all I can think is, "No wait, not yet....".
I read somewhere on a mom blog (but for the life of me I can't remember where) something along the lines of this: "while most of us, thankfully, do not lose our children to death, every single one of us will lose our children to time". It's true. I've decided a year just isn't a long enough time to enjoy a baby. Why can't they be babies for for like three years and then just skip right over the terrible twos? Don't get me wrong, there have been hard times over the past 11 months. I think my friend Amber put it best when she warned me, "with babies, the highs are so incredibly high but then, the lows are soooo low." Some of my low points include: sitting in Southern California traffic with a screaming baby. Feeling like my arms are going to fall off from trying to carry 8 bags of groceries, a stroller, and a squirmy baby through two pool gates and up the stairs. The long nights and sometimes even longer days. The clingyness. The blowouts. The teething. The biting that comes with the teething. I could go on, but I think you get the picture. But then there are the high points: The giggles and squeals while we play. The squishy thighs and roly-poly belly. The sleepy cuddles. The snorting. The impromptu dance parties. The sense of wonder. These are the things that make it all worth it. I'm telling you, this baby stuff is addicting. If I could, I would have 20 more. But even if I did have 20 more babies, I would still miss my baby Shye. So today, I'm gonna try to soak in as much of her babyness as I can.
While she is still only 10 months old.
I find myself longing for the baby days again with my own daughter. I'll see a newborn or a baby around that age and long for the days when I could hold my baby in my arms all day long. Everyone always told me to enjoy it while I could because I'd miss it when it was gone, and they were SO right!
ReplyDeleteThere are a lot of things to look forward to in the coming months and years with Shye, but I hope in the meantime you enjoy her babyness!
IT dosent matter if your baby is 10 months or 40years old there is always milestones that will fill you with joy and sadness at the same time.Dont worry about things like having to be perfect with a spotless home.If I had a do over id spend less time cleaning and more time cuddling,, there is no feeling to compare with holding your own newborn for the first time, you never forget no matter what happens in the years that pass she will always be your baby .....forever
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